


Dear Jisung

by hwangsungfairy



Category: NU'EST, Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, Epistolary, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-26
Updated: 2018-08-26
Packaged: 2019-07-02 22:20:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15805689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hwangsungfairy/pseuds/hwangsungfairy
Summary: Jisung dies unexpectedly, and Daniel writes letters to bear with his pain of having lost him.





	Dear Jisung

**Author's Note:**

> Have fun reading, and kind reminder not to leave kudos, pretty please and thank you <3

**2019**

Dear Jisung,

It’s been one month since you died.

I’m not even sure why I’m writing a letter to a dead person. I talked with my family, and I was told that putting my feelings into words could help with the pain, so here I am trying my best to write. By the end of this letter, the ink might be stained by tears.

I haven’t fully come around the idea that you are dead. It’s an impossible thing to accept. How could you be dead when you were alive a month ago? I hate it.

They caught your murderer. He was wanted for a few other murders through South Korea, and now that he is arrested, he was put to trial. I don’t know yet what’s going to happen to him, and truthfully, I’m too heart-broken to care.

I keep replaying the evening you died in my mind, wondering how we went from you going to the convenience store to you never coming back, and the police finding your body in an alley. I don’t know. I’m confused. I have no fucking clue how someone could’ve possibly murdered you of all people.

I was told not to do that, but I keep imagining scenarios where someone would’ve gone with you, and could’ve potentially saved you. I would do anything to bring you back, but there’s nothing to be done. I’m just left with my tears and with my pain.

I only stopped crying this week. Before that, I would wake up crying, spend most of my day depressed, and cry myself to sleep.

At this moment, I’m still confused as to where this letter is going, so bear with me.

Following your murder, Wanna One disbanded a few weeks earlier. We had been told that we would stay together until the end of January, but after you died at the beginning of the month, everything was canceled. I don’t think any of us would’ve had the heart to perform anyway. I was told by the company to go on a break, so that’s what I did. The fans keep sending condolences.

I’ll end now, I’m feeling tired… and slightly less buried by my feelings. I’ll write to you soon again.

Daniel.

* * *

**2019**

Dear Jisung,

I hope you’re well in heaven. I’m a bit better now, even though so many things keep reminding me of you. I’m still on a break. The company thinks I need it, and I know I do. Some of the members have gone back to working, and they’re all doing well.

There is something I must tell you, because I can’t keep it to myself. Recently, I saw Minhyun again, and we talked and had dinner, and he told me he loved you.

You read that right, Minhyun is in love with you. I’m using present tense because from the way he said it, he still loves you. I couldn’t believe it, because nothing he had ever said or done could’ve hinted that, and yet… I’m the only one who knows. He told me that he couldn’t think of another person to confess his feelings for you, and I do understand why he would feel that way. He never had the chance to tell you in person, but his love for you is really sincere. He made me cry, and I think me crying also made him cry.

I believe we’ve grown closer through you. We agreed on meeting more often. Actually, we’re going to visit your grave soon, together. We’ll bring flowers, and I’ll bring this letter. I don’t know how many letters I’ll leave at your grave, but I think you should expect a few more.

I miss you.

Daniel

* * *

**2020**

Dear Jisung,

I’m better now, and I hope you are still doing okay in heaven. This letter will only be a few words, because I am running out of time. I’ll be going to the military soon, earlier than I planned. I want to get over with it, and hopefully get a fresh start once I am done serving the country. Wish me luck!

Miss you.

Daniel.

* * *

**2024**

Dear Jisung,

It’s been a while since my last letter, but important things happened and I wanted to tell you about them. Firstly, I have a confession.

I’m now dating your boyfriend.

He was never your boyfriend since you disappeared before he could be, but trust me, I’m sure you two would’ve been the best couple. I’ve already told you about the time he confessed his love for you to me, and I know deep inside, he still loves you. How could he not, when you were such a precious person? You would’ve loved him, Jisung, I know it. He fits your ideal type to a t: tall, handsome, nice, caring, and I could go on forever. He loved you so much, he still does, and I really admire his pure love for you.

I kissed him. I know and have known of his never ending love for you for so long, but I kissed him after we visited you at the cemetery. I don’t know how he felt, and I’m not sure how I felt, but after we had dinner together, I knew I needed to kiss him. Kissing him felt good, and after, I asked him if he wanted to come over at my place.

I’m sort of ashamed to admit this, but we made love. There weren’t much words between us, but I believe we were on the same wavelength, and it happened naturally. The following morning when I woke up, he was there, in my bed, and I knew I didn’t want to let him go.

We’re boyfriends now. I believe he is the only person on Earth I could date, as he is the only one who understand my affection for you, and the way it affects me, and will affect me for the rest of my life. I believe so because he is the same. We’ve said I love you to each other a few times, but I hear that part of his words are meant for you. I don’t mind. I think that through loving each other, we are also able to love you, in our own way.

I love you Jisung, I miss you dearly. This letter was long, but I hope that my sincere words will reach you, and that you can somehow watch over me and Minhyun. He told me to tell you “I love you” on his behalf, so, from Minhyun: I love you.

Daniel

* * *

**2027**

Dear Jisung,

I sure am glad no one besides Minhyun knows about my letters to you, or else they would call me a freak. Once again, I feel like it’s been a long time since I last updated you on Minhyun’s and my life, so here is a letter.

I hope heaven treats you right, and that you are able to watch over all of your loved ones, just the way you did when you were on Earth. Minhyun and I had dinner at your favorite restaurant on your birthday, and we both shed a few tears. So many of your death anniversaries have gone by, but we still miss you dearly.

I have news for you: Minhyun and I will soon retire from the entertainment industry. You would’ve been sad about it, but NU’EST will be disbanding in a few days. They came to this decision as their contracts with their company are expiring, and everyone wants to lead their own life. Minki, Dongho and Jonghyun plan on remaining in the industry, but Aron and Minhyun want to quit. Aron said he wanted to focus on family (we visited him and saw his wife and children, lovely as ever). As for me, I will also quit, but I don’t plan on doing nothing. Minhyun and I will open an artistic center, where he will be a vocal coach, while I will be a dance teacher.

And here comes the biggest news: Minhyun and I are getting married to each other. He proposed, I said yes, we both cried, and called our families. There were many happy tears, and we are currently preparing the ceremony. Our decision to quit the industry is also linked to our upcoming wedding. I don’t mind leaving: there were good sides, and less good ones. Now I also want to focus on myself and my soon-to-be-husband, even if it’s not going to be easy facing the bad vibes. I hope you can be happy for us, please send us your blessings.

I love you, and, as usual, Minhyun also says I love you.

Daniel

* * *

**2027**

Dear Jisung,

A quick letter on the day after I married Minhyun. The ceremony went well. Seongwu was my best man, and Minhyun had asked Jonghyun. Both our families were there, and many, many friends came too. Some seniors from the industry came as well, and it was very heart-warming. It happened very quickly, and by the time the next morning came we were happily married.

I’m writing this letter from the garden, in our new house in which we have fully moved. Minhyun is still asleep, and we have some cleaning ahead of us after yesterday’s party, but it was all worth it. Fun fact, I am still Kang Daniel, and Minhyun is still Hwang Minhyun. Kang Minhyun or Hwang Daniel didn’t appeal us, so we kept our respective names.

Here’s to a happy life with the man I love, and I hope you can keep on watching over us from heaven. From both Minhyun and I: we love you.

Daniel.

* * *

**2037**

Dear Jisung,

Here is what I believe to be one of my last letters to you. I haven’t written to you in years, because we got so busy, and the upcoming years will be even busier. I’ve learned to cherish your memory through other ways, and I don’t feel the need to update you with written words anymore. As morbid as it might sound, I want to write my very last letter to you to a day close to my death. I will leave this world with no regrets if I know I wrote to you one last time before peacefully joining you in heaven.

Our artistic center is thriving, despite the bad rumors that remained throughout the years, and we keep having young celebrities visiting us. Sometimes, some of the kids we trained even became idols, and as ex-idols, Minhyun and I couldn’t be prouder.

I know you’ve seen it already, but Minhyun and I have children now. It was a very long and hard process to get through adopting them, but we managed to do it, and we’ve never been happier. Our family isn’t perfect, but it’s a good one. I’ll go ahead and ask you, as always, for your blessings for my family and I’s future. Things would’ve been so different if you had been there, but I have come around, and I know things cannot be changed.

In the next life, I hope you and Minhyun can be happily together, and I hope I can be your best friend again. That’s all I’m asking.

I’m running out of words. Not writing to you in years made me lose the habit of doing so. I was never good with words like you were in the first place anyway.

I love you. Minhyun loves you.

Daniel

**Author's Note:**

> Kind reminder not to leave kudos, pretty please and thank you <3


End file.
